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I kid you not. A senior researcher has (jokingly) conducted research into why teaspoons disappear from staff rooms. The fancy name of the study is; 

The case of the disappearing teaspoons: longitudinal cohort study of the displacement of teaspoons in an Australian research institute.

There was an assumption that only the fancy teaspoons disappeared but alas no. There is no discrimination when it comes to teaspoon theft.

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